As I was pondering in the shower, an analogy came to me. It seemed to work pretty well in my head, but it might look a little different on paper (er, in pixels).
The concept; men are cars, and sex is gas. Men need sex, cars need gas. You need to accept that in order to continue; admittedly there are many people who don't require any sex (perhaps these men are the equivalent of solar cars), but just for this analogy you'll have to agree with these statements.
Now cars need gas, and most women know this. However, the need for gas is not the reason women would choose the car. Indeed, it is just a byproduct of receiving the services of a car. The problem I see as I talk to my less-than-successful friends, is that they do the equivalent of drawing attention to their need for gas. A woman is most likely aware of a car's need for gas, so drawing attention to this does not increase your chances of being successful. There do exist particular women who enjoy filling up their car with gas, or don't mind a car which consumes a lot of gas, however they most often go for the best car available. I mean, if you are going to have to fill up with gas regularly, why not get some other benefits too like a nice looking car? Women who like filling up on gas hence have a pretty good range of cars; because as far as cars go, they all enjoy a bit of gas every now and then.
Enter the nice guy; he's the car that takes very little to no gas. He can have a relationship with a lady and hide his fuel meter entirely; however he will complain when he's running on empty and requires some gas: the woman will potentially be surprised "I didn't know you needed gas? If I had have known that, I probably wouldn't have chosen this car". Whilst not knowing a car requires gas might seem overly naive; to expect a man to go without sex can potentially be a naive thing to do also.
The point is, I think a more successful approach to a woman is not to hide sex entirely, but there is no need to advertise it either. The latter will end up with a very unattractive mate, the former will end up with a "pussy whipped" lad. Certain women are comfortable talking openly about sex, although very very few would be willing to go in to the details. Hence a question like "your breasts are nice and plump; Do you like to have your nipples rubbed with massage oil?" would most likely make the subject feel very uncomfortable; whereas the more generic statement "Now how does fat become attractive just by adding a nipple to it?" might be more inviting and less direct; although still potentially a topic of conversation you would want to conduct at a pub and not an office workplace. (Although it must be said; very few women find their own body parts to be of anywhere near the level of interest/excitement that a horny man would find them).
I'm sure this analogy works if you substitute a man requiring sex for any other item that requires something else; it's just an interesting analogy to pursue (at least I found it interesting).
Now how does this relate to all the porn addicts? Well porn is an avenue that most take as it is a lot easier to manage than a relationship. There are tradeoffs in terms of rewards, but as a whole it does give a lot of short term benefits. The problem that inhibits a large portion of people giving up porn is that I imagine there is no reason to. However, it is important to remember that there *are* benefits to giving up porn. Improving relationships is just one benefit; however it is important not to make the mistake (as obvious as it sounds) of treating women like porn. Women are not porn, they are not sex objects, and very very few would have sex on the brain (and those that do would either go for alpha males or potentially be below your standards!). They have different wants and needs to men, and in order to start a relationship, you have to recognise this. If you don't have any female friends, the first step would be to make some. Make it clear (without actually stating it) that you don't want to have sex with her; choose a girl that already has a boyfriend, or is married etc. Then engage in conversation with her; notice how the conversations are very different to what men discuss? If you just want sex; unfortunately you are likely to set yourself up for failure. Women like this do exist, but even if you do attract one, the chances are you'll find that you'll be left as unfulfilled as porn leaves you.
